Before and After ADHD

I've suspected that I had ADHD for many years.   From my perspective, my mind has been racing for many years and I found myself flitting like a butterfly from one project to another, while never finishing any of them.

When I was working, my office was filled with piles of partially completed projects.  When my office space increased, the number of piles multiplied.  I wanted to be different - I TRIED to be different but instead I continued along the same path.  I periodically made progress in some areas and fell behind in others.  It wasn't a matter of time, it was focus.  Often, I didn't have enough time, but even when I did, I didn't have enough focus.  Because I was a conscientious employee, I worked hard to do my job, mainly to meet the needs of my students.

Then came the arrival of high blood pressure medications!  A pleasant byproduct has been a lessening of my ADHD symptoms.  I find myself able to focus!!   Initially, my mind was slowed too much, keeping me from being able to accomplish anything.  I didn't like the feeling.  In fact, I wanted to stop taking the medication. 

After about three weeks, my mind began to clear and I have found that my focus is so much better.  ADHD is not about will power, it is about an inability to regulate focus.  I much prefer being able to focus even if my mind is occasionally foggy.  I am able to listen to a conversation without my mind racing due to every little distraction in my environment.  I am able to listen to a sermon without my mind racing due to every little distraction in my environment.  I HAVE FOCUS!!!  I know that it is difficult to choose just the right dose for BP medications (or ADHD) but I am staying with them.  They will keep me healthier in the long run and I like being able to focus :)

This experience has caused me to think a lot about children with ADHD.  It's helped me to understand what it's like in a more concrete way now that I have experienced the before and after.  It has not helped me know whether it's better to medicate a child.  There are so many issues involved with ADHD medication that I don't know about.  There are also many degrees of ADHD and every child is unique.

So many ideas - so little time?

I have so many things I want to talk about but so few minutes of clarity.  THAT is my dilemma, clarity, not time.

It turns out that I have high blood pressure, and yes my children, it IS genetic so you need to be aware in a few decades.  The medications I am on are all low dose but they still cause me to feel drugged - confused, disoriented, overtired.  I have started feeling better within the last few days, sometimes for a few hours at a time, sometimes more.  I have confidence in my family doctor and I predict that within a few weeks I will be feeling better than I have in decades.  IMAGINE THAT - better than I have felt in decades!  That's longer than some of you have been adults!  It's an awesome thing to look forward to.

I have had lots of time to think but little energy for concentration and I keep hearing this little jingle in my head - "High Blood Pressure, the Silent Killer" that makes me so thankful for medications that can help.  I am also SO THANKFUL that I am otherwise healthy!

As my head clears, I have lots of thoughts to share.

Posts to come:

Budding Photographer
Mimi and Nanna Hit Birmingham
Spring Sing Visit
Selling our House
DAR